Are we what we pretend to be

Putting a mask or pretending to be someone/something is not a seldom case but this might be a serious problem for all of us to wear a mask before our actual face. Oh sorry! I cannot spell this as a problem but it has become a virtual part of our real life isn’t it?  This is just like the lies, if you live on lies then to hide one lies you have to throw up more lies and you will feel you are entirely going away from the truth. 

Do you know why do we actually pretend? It is believe or not but because to fit ourselves with the social norms. We adapt this practice in fear of social insecurities, we fear that we will not balance with the norms of social that how people want you to see among the other people. Yes, there are various sub-reasons that why do we pretend , if it is in a relationship then we fake for someone’s happiness or to meet their expectation , if it's a business then it is simply for business gain, if it's for personal benefits then it's completely unethical and blah! . of course pretending is very necessary when it comes for decision making for something big but does it really need in our daily life activities ? Cannot we lead a happy and peaceful life without faking ourselves?

What happens when you stop pretending?


  • People will expect from you only what is real in you not much nor less than that. 
  • You will be dealing with the real life incidents and you will be habitual to tackle them.
  • More self confidence.
  • You are more mature than before
  • You will be out of the fantasy world that might be a sad part for some time.
  • No more faking smile and most important fact is YOU WILL START BEING TRUE.


The more you try to pretend to be okay the more you will feel you are going away from reality of life and living in fake world. Believe me if something is making you down then try to observe it with the real in you and for sure you will find a solution for that. Things come to your life as an opportunity or as a lesson and if you learn how to handle this situation then it will never come back to your life as a lesson. Never let any situation or person turn you into a fake person , as by pretending you will detour the situation only for that moment but you will not like it at all later part of your life.  

Walking along the sea shores refresh the soul 




We are not but our age is beautiful 


street photography, street thoughts
I have left collage 3 years ago and I realized that we learn more from the streets in real life scenario than any lessons from the classroom. We should be more practical to our life than conceptual approach.

Fallen leaves
What makes us different makes us beautiful 



Though it is a late post now, It was mid of March about twenty days back
From last two year I have not went out of my hometown and I was feeling like I am stuck inside a container . All I wanted to pack my bag and leave for an unknown destination ,but conceptually that was a little tough decision for me.  We have got a wedding invitation at Bhubaneswar, it was weekend so I four days of casual leave from work , we stuff our luggage and headed towards Bhubaneswar.
Me and Dolon thought that it would be beautiful wedding night within that grand city and it was a beautiful wedding actually but we were facing a huge communication gap. I can not speak Oriya nor I understand it and I was surprised that only few people could understand Hindi properly. We both were feeling like we were sinking on ocean with no sign of land from any direction and somehow we survived the wedding night  and on the next morning we made an uncertain plan to visit Puri and stay there for next two days. We took a cab and it was a beautiful ride of about more than an hour. My eyes were peeping out of window as we can see there were lots of tourists place, monuments, museum and natural parks that we were skipping but unfortunately we did not have enough time and it should have taken a whole day to visit all those places as well already had made reservation way back to howrah.

Finally we reached Puri and because of an extremely unplanned trip at an unknown city it was tough for us to find a good hotel rooms and we took some locals help they suggested that to stay near City Road beach which less crowded and more clean than the other beaches and as suggested we hopped in at Hotel City Plaza which is just near the beach at a Beautiful location.

Next morning we woke up early just to get a glimpse of sunrise from the horizon of sea and also my first ever walk on the sea beach.  It was an amazing experience when the golden-reddish sun came out from the horizon . I dare say it was a magical experience when I stepped my bare foot on the wet sand for the first time, I remember the impressive scale of ever rolling water pressing my toes in cool sand while the cool-warm wind whipped at my ears and skin that still rolls through my mind. Then we settled down on the wet sand and had a playful hours with waves and sea shores.

Then after getting refreshed we planned to visit  Shri Gaur Vihar Ashram which is about 5 KM from there so we booked an auto and contracted him for other place such as golden Gouranga, Suvadra Mandir, house of Gouranga etc. The road was so rough and unpaved but the atmosphere and location of the ashram is incredible and isolated. This is the place where Chaitanya Mahaprabhu has came during his time and mediated. This place is free for public and also have wheelchair facility so that one can can take their aged parents there. I found it very attractive with peaceful natural environment, sculptures and statues of different God and Goddess. There is a giant statue of Shri Hanuman . I found a beautiful temple of Shani Dev and different sculptures from Sri Krishna’s life and many more. It is a must visit place in puri.  Then we headed towards golden Gouranga, Suvadra Mandir, house of Gouranga and spent the rest of the evening at beach with sea foods.







Next days we again booked an auto to visit Shri Jagannath Temple , one of the prime attraction of Puri. There was a huge queue and I was afraid that we have to stand in queue for hours and there were some irritating pandas but finally after standing in a queue for sometime finally we got our turn to enter into the temple. Unfortunately phones and cameras are not allowed inside the temple. We sat inside the temple for sometime and it was really charming and peace of mind. We both were lost in our own depth thoughts. The architecture of the temple is very alluring and took us back to the classical era. The times of the Lord Krishna beautifully expressed on the walls and pillars of the temple. It was created by King Anantavarman Chodaganga Deva during the 12th century.
Then we spent rest of the day at beach and boarded our train at evening at headed back to howrah. There were much more place to visit at Puri & Bhubaneswar but we could not make it due shortage of time. On our next planned visit we must visit Chilka lake, Konark temple and few other place.


  It was my first experience at sea shore , the beach and wet sand and I must say the evening at the beach is more fanciful and beautiful than morning. Believe me long walk on the beach by holding the hands of your loved ones feels more unwind and relaxed. The cold-warm breeze from the sea, the roars from sea surf and bare foots on the wet sands combines together and takes us away from the chaos of daily life. It gives us the strength of inner healing and rejoice.



In her own world

the fish fry





In life not everyone has it all and everyone is not able to enjoy their childhood. 






You can't stop the waves but you can learn to surf

LETS GROW OLD TOGETHER


I was so busy that today after eleventh day of this year  I have finally realized that I have not made any resolutions for this year. Without any moto without any target  I cannot reach upto my expectations. It's not too late to start a new chapter in a new way but somewhere I have missed eleven days without following any rules of my resolutions. Let's start it now.


STAY FIT:
Health is the first important thing at first and health should be our first priority, because a lot of things in our life depends upon on our health directly or indirectly. My job, my dreams , family, loved ones, my achievements and financial stability depends on me and my health. And the most important part in this is my family that completely depends on me and I depends upon them. So if I can stay fit then I can bring smile on their faces.
We all are so engaged with our work schedule, we leave for office at morning and get back to home at evening, we restlessly work hard day and night , but for what? Money, life , achievements, success, so that we can enjoy the rest part of our life right? But what! If our health doesn't co-up with the things we want to do? Suppose we want to go out hang out with old school buddies, we want to go to our favourite restaurant and enjoy the delicious food, but our stomach is not fit to take that ! we saved our hard earned money and brought our dream house and car but because of health we can not enjoy it!! Then what's the point of hard work if everything goes in vains just for one term “HEALTH” ?

BLOGGING:
I was not in touch with blogosphere since last one year, because hectic schedule of life and somewhere I was a slightly upset with myself as I was not getting that much of response from here , maybe because lack of quality contents. But now I am going to stick it  and I am going to write oftenly whenever I can, because blogging brings smile on my face , and whenever someone give response on my posts it gives me a joy from inside. I will surely work hard on it.

BE ORGANISED
I have also written this on my previous post. I have seen like in daily life incident we can quickly find a book from a bookshelf where every book has been labeled properly and placed orderly. And it's very irritating when we have to find a book where every book is unlabelled and scattered around poorly. In such way of we try to organized everything , I know everything is not possible but how much probably we can, then our life will become easy and more manageable than before. Believe me!


WORK-LIFE-BALANCE
From past few months I was so busy with my work that even on weekend I use to work on some private projects other than my regular jobs. It was not for extra earnings but because I loved the research works that I do. But after some incidents I have realized that spending time with family is important as our job. I believe I don't need to work extra hours other than the duty hours for which I have been deployed to prove my credibility towards the boss and organisation. If there is an emergency I will give my full support towards it but other than this I don’t think it's necessary to prove myself towards the organization. Because I have a life and a family, and my presence at my family is much important. They also need my support and some time with me.

TRAVEL:
From last two years I have not went out for any tour. I just want to get some fresh air, experience something new . I want to explore the nature, snow, mountains, seas. I have my entire life to work but I won’t get much time to frequently travel . I want to leave all the stress, buzz of the city and pack my bag. Hold the hand of my loved one and go out to relax and gaze around.

So these are my resolutions for this year and I will stick to it positively and try my best to achieve them.
ME Thinking of loosing a year





LETS DO IT


The Real Me

As the year comes to an end and it seems the year have passed by in the blink of an eye, I don’t know why when I had some important thing to do in my life but time passes away terribly fast that I wish I could have hold the time tighter in my hand but the tighter I hold the faster it ran out of my hand and I realized that time is just like a handful of sand, the more you try to hold it tighter, the faster it runs out between your fingers.
Today is the last day of this year and It is a great time to take few moments to look back about everything  that happened in 2018 and what I intend to do in next year.

For me is was an amazing, hectic, crazy hell of a year. For my personal life it was a year filled with joys, family gatherings, festivals and lots of love. I learned to take responsibility towards myself and my family. Well, my professional life was full crazy. Everyday it was seems like more challenging. As I am  working with law and enforcement agency everyday became more challenging because there are some crimes which has taken place on our cyber space beyond our imagination and has put a adverse effect around our society. What I learned from my professional life is that Do your today’s work on today and don’t leave it for tomorrow because tomorrow there can be a hell of work, love what you do because if you love your work then you will not take your work as burden. Also never take your as work as home assignment because far away from the chaos of work you have a life to live , spend some time with yourself and your family as a proper work-life balance is much needed.

In 2018 I have seriously committed myself with my job, I commited my time and energy into it, but the feedback was not upto my expectation. I was slightly upset with my department but I managed to co-up myself because I know there are ups and downs in life and I have to take only the positive vibes from those changes.

The best thing happened to me in 2018 when I got married to Sipra, the one who is my best friend from childhood and we were in relationship from last eight years and finally we got married. There were family gatherings, bond between our two family became more stronger.  I don’t have words to express the feelings after marrying her, I felt more stronger, I felt like I have a stronger support in my life than before, I have got a friend for life, and at the end It made me realize that now I have to be more responsible to myself and my family because now I am not alone to be cared about, I have a family.

In the end here are few brief points that life taught me in this year :

Learn to be organized:
A carefully labeled and group of books are far better than 1000 untitled books. Try to be organized whether in personal life or in professional life, whether it is emails, letters, work desk, your kitchen etc , trust me it has a great positivity in life.

Take only the positivity in your life:
Life is not always easy, there are ups and downs in everyone's’ life, there are positive vibes and negative vibes around us, believe me there are much more negativity around us than positivity, but we only need to intake the positive vibes from them. Stay away from people who demotivate you. Suppose If you have 10 chances and you failed on your 9th go then don’t think that you have failed for nine times but think that you have one more chance to go.

Believe good things are on the way :
If you failed to achieve something then don’t get disheartened always this is may be not the right thing and right time for you.There are something good for you in the bucket which are one the way.

Be responsible to yourself and your family:
Responsibilities towards yourself is the prime need as both in your career and yourself, you should improve yourself everyday, your every mistakes should be a lesson to be more responsible because so many people rely on you, your parents, your wife/husband/ friends and society. Be strong because there are so many unexpected responsibilities and duty towards your family will have to carry upon by you. At the end of the day when you return home your family will look up on you with eyes which are filled with lots of wishes , sorrows , joys and expectations. Be ready for that.
The happiest part of Me right now
a friend in need is a friend indeed

Monsoon of 2018
At a Memorious event with office Buddies
At a meetup with college buddies after a gap of one year


At the end, I am very thankful to my mom & dad for giving me the best in life and showing this beautiful world. I feel myself the happiest person alive in this planet because I have everything that I need to survive, I have my wife the girl I loved from a long ago, I have my parents , I have a decent job , I learned to be happy with what I have and yes I do have dreams and I work hard for that but never get disheartened for broken dreams. I don’t find problems in solution but I find solutions in problems and you can always see a smile on my face that is real me.

Lets hope the new year 2019 may bring more joys , health and lots of expectations, positive vibes and new resolutions.  Wish you all a Happy New Year.